Wardrobe Malfunction
by lord of lannister
Summary: Daddy!Klaine one-shot. What happens when Kurt tries to design clothes for kids. Specifically five-year old boys. Most specifically, HIS five-year old boy!


Blaine Hummel-Anderson bit down hard on his retort as his husband triumphantly revealed his latest creations. It was a line of very pretty little clothes inspired by their five-year old son.

Blaine hated being the one to pour the cold water of reality on his husband's expectations, but going by the recent fate of all little Drake's clothes, in his humble opinion, his wardrobe should only consist of canvas and leather!

There was no way any of Kurt's loving creations would last beyond a week on their son.

* * *

Blaine's thoughts proved themselves clairvoyant at an unfortunate weekend party to celebrate the success of one of Kurt's fellow designers at a sprawling estate in upstate New York. Valerie and Drake had been rubbed and scrubbed raw and spruced in their very best after being warned categorically to be on the best of their best behaviour in front of their Daddy's influential but gossip-loving friends.

It was mid-way through the party that Blaine noticed his son had disappeared.

He hunted down his daughter.

"Val, have you seen your brother?"

Valerie had been trying to get at some delicate cream puffs without being spotted and was least concerned about her little brother.

"Nope. Sorry, Dad."

Blaine was beginning to have a bad feeling about this.

He grabbed Valerie's hand so as not to lose his second child as well, and set off on a hunt of the massive estate, hoping against hope that Drake hadn't gone and done anything stupid, or worse... embarrassing.

They had just circled back after a fruitless hunt when they heard the high-pitched voice of a little boy raised in indignation.

"No! But you're _scaring _ him!"

Heart in his throat, Blaine rushed to the knot of fancily dressed people gathered around watching a very flustered Kurt trying to coax something away from an obviously agitated Drake.

As he stepped closer, Blaine noticed that his son appeared to be dripping wet from head to foot and was dressed only in a soggy satin waistcoat above his trousers. His expensive fine silk shirt, one of Kurt's favourite designs, was cradled in his hands, sopping water. Drake's attention was firmly on something inside the basin he had made of his shirt.

"Oh Dad, look!" Valerie exclaimed in a hushed whisper, tugging at his coat, " I think he's caught something!"

Yes, that was exactly what Blaine was afraid of. He'd caught something. Something probably alive, probably repulsive to the fashionistas huddled around.

Valerie left his hand and ran up to her brother, eager to examine his find and Kurt looked up with a desperate plea in his eyes.

Blaine hurried forward.

"Dad, look! Isn't he beautiful? Isn't he the littlest froggie you ever saw? I caught him in the lake."

Looking into his son's sparkling eyes, Blaine couldn't find it in his heart to scold him for behaving exactly like a spirited little boy should.

He laid a hand on his shoulder.

"He's just perfect, son. Maybe we can go find a jar for him, huh? He must be getting scared with so many people around."

Drake nodded slowly and followed Blaine meekly, cradling his precious prize in his arms.

* * *

Kurt sighed ruefully as he rubbed the remains of the ruined shirt between his fingers.

Drake had been forced into taking a hot bath once they'd gotten home, after his dousing in the lake, and their two children were right now fast asleep, their new prized pet safe in a jar on the windowsill.

Blaine looked at his husband and said softly.

"Don't blame him just for being a child, Kurt."

"I'm never going to live this down, you realize?"

"Perks of being a dad. Get used to it!"

"Do you know how much this_ cost? _ And it took me so long to perfect the design!"

Blaine smiled and wrapped his arm around Kurt's hunched shoulders.

"You know what? I think Drake's going to remember this shirt. It's the shirt his Daddy made him so he could wade through a lake and catch a frog in it and end up making a new friend on a glorious summer afternoon."

Kurt remained silent but his crystal eyes gazed up at Blaine. Blaine threaded his fingers through Kurt's, bunched up in the silk.

"It's the memory that's going to stay, Kurt. Not the shirt, not even the frog. And if this is the price we have to pay for a happy childhood for our son, then I for one will be glad to pay it."

Kurt looked away, but eventually nodded.

"One of the models came up to me later and said that she'd never thought an icky, slimy frog could actually look cute, but it did, sitting in Drake's hand."

They both smiled fondly at the memory.

"Hmph. Frogs on silk. Maybe that'll be my inspiration for my next line of couture."

Blaine got up and flashed Kurt a smirk.

"As long as next time you don't make the mistake of designing expensive clothing for five-year olds, Kurt!"

THE END


End file.
